Manual of Solitude [-unedited-] #1

The Messenger

"His face was formed in shadowy blur in front of me. No smile was formed on his lips--but there was a feeling of solitude lingering on his brown eyes. Tiny drops of rain water were slowly falling down from the tips of his unkempt hair. My vision was blurry at that moment. However, I know--in my hear that he was staring back at me. We just stood in front of each other. Although there were no words between the two of us, but nevertheless--I still felt his sorrow and the feeling of despair in his heart. I lifted my hand and genlty rubbed my wrist on my eyes. My vision cleared and--the man that was standing in front of me was no other than--me."

It was already 2 in the afternoon at that time. It was raining heavy outside. Though it was still not that late, however, the color outside was already tinted gray. I removed the courier bag that was resting on my shoulder and placed it on top of my bed. My clothes were wet, even the leather jacket that I was wearing. I was about to remove my jacket when I realized I still need to go to a convenience store nearby to buy some ingredients for my dinner later. I slowly walked towards my bedroom window. As I was getting nearer I heared the laughter of children just outside.When I finally got a view of the outside, there I saw them playing under the rain--running and jumping around the puddles of mud. Older people walk them by, with their umbrellas over their head--but instead of scolding them, they just laughed with them. I thought that maybe they also miss those moments--the fun playing under the pouring rain. During the olden days that they still haven't realize that playing with earth and mud was dirty. Maybe I miss these times too--lying on the ground facing the sky as the rain soaks you...reminiscing--I just gave the moment a smile.

My sight diverted to a small pot on my window sill. It used to have a cactus there, I thought. But now all's left was chunk of something in black. Maybe I really don't know how to take care of sombody--even this thing--or even my self. Maybe I will just really have to figure out how to live alone.

I walked outside my room and went to the kitchen. I filled the keetle with some tap water, and placed it on the top of the stove. I took a teaspoon out of the spoon and fork holder. I opened my cupboard to get a mug but there was none. I turned around and my vision moved towards the sink--and there they are, 5 mugs lying unclean. I was about to wash them but when I squeezed the dishwashing soap--it didn't resist a bit--air's what escaped from the opening. Too lazy to write it up and include it on my list of things to buy--I tried to make a mental note--don't forget to by soap. The water started to boil and so the kettle started to wail. I turned the knob of the stove off and placed the boiled water on the vacumm flask. I took my keys from the counter and threaded my way to my apartment's door. I switched the lights off and went outside to go the store.